Author Topic: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety  (Read 2685 times)
Silverliner
Administrator
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Rare white reflector


GoL
Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « on: April 06, 2024, 11:57:38 PM » Author: Silverliner
Just trying hard to be here but I feel paranoid thinking people don’t like me. I can’t understand how they claim they love me but they don’t talk to me.
Logged

Administrator of Lighting-Gallery.net. Need help? PM me.

Member of L-G since 2005.

Collector of vintage bulbs, street lights and fluorescent fixtures.

Electrician.

Also a fan of cars, travelling, working out, food, hanging out.

Power company: Southern California Edison.

LightsAreBright27
Member
****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Cheap LED Assassin


Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #1 on: April 07, 2024, 12:36:32 AM » Author: LightsAreBright27
Do you mean that by replies and comments? Even I have had a lack of interaction on some posts. Since it's an online forum, people may not be present at all times.
An online form may have a lack of interaction, but that dosent mean we don't like people.
Just... please don't leave the forum :love: , every member is valuable.
Logged

Holder of the rare and sacred :sfl: F10T12/BL :sfl: lamps here!
Also known as LAB27 for short.
One of the only Indian members here!
245v 50Hz

Laurens
Member
***
Online

View Posts
View Gallery

Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #2 on: April 07, 2024, 06:45:37 AM » Author: Laurens
A forum's a forum. Sometimes people respond, sometimes they don't.

And that is normal. The other types of social media are the ones that are messed up - with shoveling aggravating or misleading content into people's faces to force a reaction out of them. The forum doesn't have an algorhythm, that is tailored in such a way that people respond as much as possible to your posts, or put posts in your face that you are most likely to do something with - being positive or negative.
There are no 'likes' on a forum, and that's good. Because after all, the hunt for likes on the other platforms is nothing other than a hunt for validation and that little serotonin boost many drug users crave so much.
The gallery has a voting system, but it's very unubtrusive. There's no ranking on the amount of likes someone's pictures get.

Forums are also, strictly speaking, vintage technology. There simply are fewer people on here than on any of the other 'universal' platforms like facebook, twitter and such. So you might get less interaction overall, and more a sense of talking into the void. The era of forums having hundreds of posts a day are long gone, save for 1 of 2 true survivors like www.circuitsonline.net (electronics) or the somethingawful.com forums (which matured really nicely, all the obnoxious edgy stuff is left in the 2000s era, and the terrible original owner sold it to a staff member about 5 years ago)

There's also no artificial, parasocial relationship, that makes you think you have an actual friendship with a streamer or youtuber, who can make it seem you actually know them - but when you have several thousand of people watching, there's no individual relationship anymore. Many platforms encourage whipping up such feelings with the audience. The absence of such can be a bit jarring, if you're not used to it. 

So in the end i'd say (and of course that's easier said than done for some people, i know that) - don't worry about it. Enjoy the fact that there's still a place where the world doesn't revolve around posting something that gets the maximum number of interactions. Do not compare your interaction here, to that on other mass media platforms, who do have those self amplifying feedback systems in place.
« Last Edit: April 07, 2024, 06:50:27 AM by Laurens » Logged
Rommie
Guest
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #3 on: April 07, 2024, 09:17:32 AM » Author: Rommie
Hey, you've been here practically since day 1. Always at the end of a PM or a Discord message if you need to talk  :love:
Logged
rjluna2
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Robert


GoL
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #4 on: April 07, 2024, 10:31:38 AM » Author: rjluna2
Don't get me wrong, Dave.  This is a wonderful site that I visit everyday :)

If people are looking at your pictures, there is a visit counter of these pictures you have uploaded.  That is a good sign that you have a good posting.  If not, oh well.  I wouldn't worry about that.

I wanted to say it to you that you have been posting wonderful pictures at the gallery side :love:

Keep the good work here.
Logged

Pretty, please no more Chinese failure.

LightsoftheWest
Member
*****
Online

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

SRP for life.


streetlightian
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #5 on: April 09, 2024, 12:09:42 AM » Author: LightsoftheWest
Dave, you're one of my closest friends here on the forum. You're also one of the most knowledgeable. Don't let opposing feelings get the best of you. You're particularly an important asset to this site because you've been an active member since the day the site was founded.

Please, Dave; give us a chance. We would hate it if you left, especially since you're an original member.
Logged

LG's #1 North American light fixture identifier

**If anyone wants to learn more about any company or product you've never heard of before, do please leave a comment saying so on one of my gallery pictures or by PM, and I'd be happy to give a thorough explanation.**

Cole D.
Member
*****
Offline

View Posts
View Gallery

123 V 60 CPS


Dk944Mr-jX4jbnoUUj7xAw
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #6 on: April 21, 2024, 01:29:41 PM » Author: Cole D.
I enjoy your photos, even though I’m not on here all that often and don’t comment a lot.

A lot of times I don’t get any comments on my photos either and I understand the feeling, but like I said, I don’t always comment on others myself, so I wouldn’t sweat it!
Logged

Collect vintage incandescent and fluorescent fixtures. Also like HID lighting and streetlights.

marcopete87
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #7 on: April 22, 2024, 06:25:43 PM » Author: marcopete87
Just trying hard to be here but I feel paranoid thinking people don’t like me. I can’t understand how they claim they love me but they don’t talk to me.

Why do you think that?
I think forum as a pub with live music: sometimes you go in this place, meet some people, chat; other times, you enter, take a drink while listening the music and return home.
Sometimes someone wants only to read topics, but isn't much interested on replying (i'm more interested on photos than chat) and this doesn't absolutely mean someone is annoyed with someother.
« Last Edit: April 22, 2024, 06:29:10 PM by marcopete87 » Logged
Econolite03
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Matthew E.


WWW
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #8 on: April 22, 2024, 08:04:29 PM » Author: Econolite03
Hey Dave feel free to message me if you need to.
Logged
BT25
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #9 on: April 22, 2024, 08:34:08 PM » Author: BT25
Dave, you're not ignored here...members/public look at your photos. Sorry that you feel ignored...keep your chin up. :bulbman:
I have to be honest and say I miss the interaction that used to be here...not much conversation like there once was... :sadbulb:
As for me, I have other responsibilities that keep me away for the most part, even thought I check in almost daily, and comment when appropriate.
Logged
Bulbman256
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Mad Max


Bulbman256
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #10 on: April 23, 2024, 10:31:53 PM » Author: Bulbman256
Hey Dave,

I will say that you are an important piece of the community and I speak for most if not all of us that you are liked here. Activity here has just slowed down since when I joined back in 2020. Everyone's just gotten busy, definitely the case for me. I haven't had the chance to post or talk here for a good long while. Unfortunately life gets in the way but we still enjoy the presence of you and other members on the site. :)
Logged

Collecting light bulbs since 2012, a madman since birth.

Cole D.
Member
*****
Offline

View Posts
View Gallery

123 V 60 CPS


Dk944Mr-jX4jbnoUUj7xAw
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #11 on: May 02, 2024, 06:04:53 PM » Author: Cole D.
Hmm, I’ve started to wonder if I’ve been blocked on the message boards, because I’ve noticed my post will be the only one in a thread that the original poster doesn’t respond to. Kind of odd, and I’ve seen this multiple times.
Logged

Collect vintage incandescent and fluorescent fixtures. Also like HID lighting and streetlights.

Rommie
Guest
Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #12 on: May 02, 2024, 06:14:11 PM » Author: Rommie
Well I can assure you there is no block of any kind on your account, and in any event I can't think of one that would have the effect you describe, so I don't know  ???
Logged
BT25
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery

Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #13 on: May 02, 2024, 08:51:28 PM » Author: BT25
Hmm, I’ve started to wonder if I’ve been blocked on the message boards, because I’ve noticed my post will be the only one in a thread that the original poster doesn’t respond to. Kind of odd, and I’ve seen this multiple times.
I've noticed that too...usually it's due to being the last commenter...no big deal.
Logged
wide-lite 1000
Member
*****
Offline

Gender: Male
View Posts
View Gallery


Re: Being here gives me extreme social anxiety « Reply #14 on: May 02, 2024, 09:06:28 PM » Author: wide-lite 1000
I've noticed that sometimes I seem to be the "Thread Killer" ! I'll respond to a popular thread and afterwards no one else replies !!
Logged

Collector,Hoarder,Pack-rat! Clear mercury Rules!!

Print 
© 2005-2024 Lighting-Gallery.net | SMF 2.0.19 | SMF © 2021, Simple Machines | Terms and Policies